Skeletal Remains found in Joyce Tower Sewers

Posted on: April 1, 2018

The sewage system at the James Joyce Tower & Museum has always been problematic frequently necessitating the closure of toilet facilities on the site. The ancient plumbing, it was always thought, simply could not cope with the demands of the large numbers of visitors to this iconic building (42,000 in 2017). Well, that’s what was thought – until now!

Having finally decided to tackle the issue, works were recently begun on repairing the tower’s ancient and clogged waste pipes. In the course of these repairs, a macabre discovery was made by the DLR CoCo Waste Water Management Division.  In the main sewage outlet from the tower, mysterious skeletal remains were found to be a primary cause of the blockages over the years.

Said DLR Project Manager, Amy Feuille, ‘At first, we thought we had uncovered human remains – possibly a large child – and I immediately notified the Gardaí who dispatched Detective Sargent, Anthony (Tony) Messin, to investigate’.

Presentation1

Messin, on arrival at the scene, firstly removed a completely intact femur bone from the pipes. When this leg was pulled, the rest of the skeleton dislodged itself from inside the sewage pipe and various bones were bagged and sent ‘back to barracks’ for forensic examination.

‘A complete and comprehensive investigation will be carried out to determine if any crime has been committed’, promised Messin, ’We are not just going through the motions’.

Happily, upon examination, the skeleton was found to be that of a large cat and not of human origin at all.  It was also found, from carbon dating, to be over a hundred years old probably dating back to the early 1900’s.

panther

In a bizarre twist, it was also determined that this large feline (possibly a panther) had died of a gunshot wound to the head. Skull fragments showed a revolver or similar handgun to be the likely weapon used to dispatch the unfortunate feline.

How had this happened all those years ago? Who had curiously killed the cat and disposed of its carcass in the drains of the Tower?

There must, surely, be a story behind this mysterious discovery.

Anyone with any information or theories about this strange discovery should contact the Friends of Joyce Tower Society before the day is out.